I don't know if I can yell any louder

Life has been epic, to say the least.

It is just assignments and work and all the other nonsense piling down on me everyday. Every one of them just screaming out for my attention, I almost want to just tell them to get a life. It's the same rant everyday: Why do I need to know how to use Microsoft Excel? I don't really have to do this, do I? Why didn't I start doing this earlier? Why do I have so many things to do? Why, oh why, do I seem to gravitate towards Facebook every five minutes?

I don't want to do Computer Applications.
I don't want to think about Environmental Science.
I don't want to work 5 hours a week for a stupid scholarship.
I don't want to crack my head over ideas.
I don't want to handle these people.
I don't want this responsibility.
I don't want this.

Please, God, just take it away.

I am only one person, with a head, two arms and two legs and a brain that is not exactly Einstein. I should not be expected to do all of this and finish it with excellence.

And then I saw this guy.



I am reminded.

Humbled.

Inspired.

Oz.

Give me some courage that I might be with you.
Give me some brains that I might think of you.
Give me a heart that I may love.

You.

Here's a story

There was a cat who lived on the left side of the house. Every day its owner will put food on the right side of the house. So the cat will cross over, eat, walk back, and sleep on its cushion until the next meal.

Then one day, as the car was just about to cross over to the right side of the house to get its meal, it saw something in its way: a GIGANTIC GREEN-FACED CLOWN was standing right there, in the middle of the room, blocking the cat's path to its food tray, and staring at the cat with HUGE UNBLINKING CREEPY EYES.

The cat got scared. Ten times faster than you can blink, it ran and hid behind its cushion, cautiously watching the clown. The clown had a sick grin on its face as it rocked back and forth, taunting the cat.

The cat watched. The clown grinned, his arms spread wide in a mock goalkeeper's pose. "Alright," The cat thought to itself, "We'll see who gets starved first - the clown or I!"

First hour. The clown was not moving. Neither was the cat.

Second hour. The clown was still not moving. Cat is getting impatient.

Fourth hour. The clown still hasn't moved. Cat realized that it was getting tired. And hungry.

Sixth hour - the clown HAS NOT MOVED AN INCH! He still had the wicked grin etched across his face and his too-large eyes did not even blink as it watched the cat. The cat was getting VERY hungry.

The cat extended its claws.

Do or die.

It watched the clown, who seemed to mock its ferocious gaze.

Do or die.

The cat snarled. The clown grinned back.

Do or die.

Like a bolt of lighting, the cat had its claws sinking into the clown's face before the second hand on the clock could move twice. The cat swung another paw right at the clown's forehead-

POP!

The cat suddenly found itself standing on a deflated rubber sheet.

One word: Hallelujah

See, there are many words used in the Bible to say "praise God." There's "glory to God in the highest", "Hosanna", or just a simple "praise the Lord". On top of all that, there is one more that holds a special meaning when seen in context... That word is Hallelujah.

It only appears in Revelations (really scary book to read) when all the wars are going on and strange creatures are coming out. Then it says in chapter 19 that heaven itself resounded with a cry: Hallelujah... Our God reigns. And when they said that, God himself came down and won the victory.

What is remarkable is that the sound of heaven was not praising God for celebration or because something good has happened - it was a battle cry from the deep conviction that God is going to bring back the victory in the end, no matter how bad things may seem.

For some of us maybe we have exams going on now - for the college students probably you have assignments not done yet; but amidst our business to get things done, let's remember to respond in faith to what God has said and just BELIEVE that things are going to turn out fine... That you are going to win.

Just one word: Hallelujah.

LOST

I was driving for the first time to college earlier today. Started my journey at 10.30am - with earphones plugged in and a full tank of gas, I was ready to do it right on the first time round!

I managed to get into the Damansara area with relative ease, when I missed a turning. The lane I was supposed to be on was on the far right. I was on the far left. With only a few meters before the right lane broke off to its own and cars zooming past me at eighty kilometers an hour, I thought that it was not a good idea to try and take the risk.

Relax, it is not the end of the world. I'll find my way back here and take the right turning.

Then I realized the roads were getting smaller.
I made a U-turn, the roads got bigger again and civilization came into view.
Then I realized I did not recognize the names on the signboards.
Made more U-turns until the word 'Damansara' appeared on a signboard.
Then abruptly, the signboards just stopped appearing.

Before I knew it, I was turning into Sunway City, going right past Mentari Court and onwards to Sunway Pyramid!

At my wits' end and on the verge of tears and a panic attack, I made a sharp turn into a row of shops and stopped the car; pulled out my phone, dialed my dad up and screamed into the phone as soon as he picked up.

"I'M LOST!"

Some half an hour later, he finally came to my rescue as I waited in Esso station just down the road of Sunway Pyramid.

*

You'll realize how life is like being on the road - at first you are so sure that you know how to get where you need to be. You get it all right right up until the final lap, and suddenly you realize that you have been accelerating a bit too much that you have missed the turn you have been aiming for.

But no matter, we can always try again, right?

Sure you can - if you knew how to get back. But armed only with very limited intellect (such as mine), you will realize that you are rapidly missing more turns and becoming increasingly hopelessly lost. Until you end up in the completely wrong place at a totally wrong times.

Be wise - stop and take a breather, grab a phone and dial up someone who knows better than you do, and scream into their ear the short, simple, brutal reality of the situation.

Or get a GPS.

12.39am

I suppose I should do something meaningful before my holidays end, say, save the world or something.

But well, I'm not superman. Plan scraped.

No, it is not that. I realized something today - people are not in danger of super-advanced aliens invading earth or gargantuan robots with laser beams for eyes; not something that superman can save them from, at least. Today I realized that the world doesn't need saving. Not in the way that we imagined, anyway.

Today I realized that people are dying from the inside. With plastic smiles and acid tears and hearts that stops working faster than a manual car driven by me.

Today I realized that I might be the only Jesus they might ever see.

So here it goes - I'm letting go.

How I spent (and will continue to spend) my holidays!

It's been three weeks since I started my hiatus from SEGi University College. Do I miss it? No way. I am, in fact, having the time of my life at home. With the help of a Rm300 Portable Hard Drive and very reliable source of entertainment (that means you, Sam), tis' what I've been up to.

1. Anime

12 gigabytes worth of shows including 2 complete seasons of Code Geass - I have been at it day and night for a week and I'm still not done with it yet!

Code Geass is set in an alternate world where a global superpower called Britannia invades and conquers Japan, then renaming it Area 11 (they have conquered one-third of the world, so they don't really have the time to think of nice names). A Britannian college student called Lelouch, through a twist of fate, attains the power to bend anyone to his will. He then creates a secret identity for himself to build an army and seeks to liberate Japan from the Britannian colonizers.

Ingeniously plotted with a fair blend of humor and intensity at appropriate times. To reach his dream of a liberated Japan, he encounters military forces, gargantuan war machines (which look suspiciously like Gundams), classmates, his best friend, and a cat called Arthur.

2. PC Games

The best of GTA, Assassins' Creed and Prince of Persia, all in one game - That's Prototype. Released early June 2009 and with a rating of 8.5/10, Prototype is one of the most addictive games I have played in a while. But if you did not like any of the three games mentioned above - this is probably not your type of game.

Warning: excessive gore. Keep away from younglings.

3. Music

I got tipped off about an *ahem*illegitimate source for music, so I decided to give it a try. Now I am stuck with 7 different albums and I don't know where to start.

One thing I have to say: No one beats Planet Shakers!

4. Books

Four books. One down, three to go. I have a strange feeling that my books are going to outlast my holidays.

If you have not read any books by John C. Maxwell yet, I tell you, you HAVE to get one of it. John Maxwell is undoubtedly one of the best communicators I have seen - presenting truths in a reader-friendly way, without the jargon and absurdly complicated words used by other authors in an attempt to look smart.

I have about 2 more weeks of this bliss left. Gotta use it to the fullest!


Jo